We shook hands to make it official. If my tacos were the best ever, as claimed, I would win the wager. Otherwise, victory went to my adversary. It was admittedly the most audacious of claims, the longest of long shots. Out of how many hundreds of Mexican restaurants and taco trucks? She took a bite and stared at me, her eyes smooth blend of “OMG,” “WTF” and “up your nose with a garden hose.”
If this confidence sounds like braggadocio, it wouldn’t be on my behalf. I did not invent that runny green sauce of cilantro, jalapeño, garlic and lime that you may have noticed at your local taco stand. I don’t know where it came from or even its name; the recipes online refer to it with the same list of ingredients. I also did not invent the trick that probably won me the wager, which I learned from a friend in California.
I did kind of invent the braised oxtails, spiced with thyme and succulent with red wine. They were leftovers from a non-Mexican meal, they were nonetheless stellar as a stand-in taco filler, the only true requirements of taco filling, as I understand it, being that it be delicious and savory, ideally with protein.
As for the tortilla trick, it feels like cheating. You heat the tortillas in a pan or griddle, and when they are piping hot on one side you flip them and add grated cheese to the piping hot sides now facing up. The cheese must be of a melty variety, such as a Mexican orange, or a northern cheddar, or manchego if you are from Spain, or blue cheese, if you partake.
When the cheese melts, turn off the heat, load the tacos and enjoy the best-ever-ness, or bask in the glory of serving them to others. The warm, cheesy treatment toughens the tortillas, making them less likely to fall apart if there is too much sauce on the tacos, as there frequently is.
Mayo Verde
It goes well on steak, eggs, salad, sandwiches, veggie side dishes, and basically anything savory. Or pour it into a glass, where it’s drinkable as a $20 bottle of wine. I call it Mayo Verde because it’s green and half mayo. We could also call it “game changer,” “performance enhancer,” or “food improver.”
1 cup Mayonnaise, ideally grapeseed oil Vegenaise.
3 Garlic cloves
4 Jalapeños, seeds removed. Roasted or raw.
1/2 lime (3 tablespoons)
2 cups Cilantro, lightly packed
Salt and pepper to taste
Possibly a few tablespoons of water
If you are roasting the jalapenos, do so in a dry pan on medium heat until blistered on all sides. Or under a broiler. Then cool and peel them. Blend all of the ingredients together until it’s a smooth green liquid, adding water if necessary to help it vortex. My son made a YouTube short of the process, including roasting the jalapeños, if you want to give it a click.
Citrus Mole Sauce
This taco filling came from ad-libbing with a combination of deer meat and deer heart. I came up with a citrus mole to counter the potentially gaminess of the meat. The next time I tried this recipe I used beef, and the result was similarly rich. But my favorite renditions have been with pieces of fatty, tender pork, like belly or sirloin.
The sauce is dark, rich, tart, sweet and fragrant with Mexican spices. While the recipe calls for grinding the whole spices, you can also used their powdered counterparts; if doing so, reduce the spice quantities by half.
1 lb meat
1/4 cup oil if the meat is lean
2 cups orange juice
1/4 cup lemon and lime juice
1 teaspoon whole fennel seed
2 tablespoons whole cumin
1 tablespoon whole coriander
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
Brown the meat in oil or its own fat. While it’s browning, grind the fennel seed, cumin and coriander
Add the ground spices, salt and pepper, red pepper and garlic, and and simmer in orange juice and lemon and lime juice. Simmer for at least 30 minutes, preferably an hour with the lid on. Finally, add the cocoa powder and simmer 10 more minutes to let it thicken. Remove the meat with a slotted spoon and add to tacos.
Consider tomato salsa and garnishes like sliced radish, minced onion and pico de gallo or fresh salsa, or something canned that tastes like Pace.
